Stars and Stripes forever

As many already know, the U.S. is set to play England in the World Cup.

Now, I could be mistaken, but I hope each and every Tblogger will be supporting the Stars and Stripes in the upcoming match.

Although I suppose Peter might excuse himself if there's a hockey match on at the same time.

But I'd especially hope James Anderson will be cheering on the Red, White, and Blue. Not only because he's found a happy home on these golden shores. But also because, as a loyal Scotsman with a brave heart and steadfast spirit, I expect him to show no mercy toward the English!

Anyway, with all this in mind:

From: Philip Breeden, US Embassy London
To: Martin Longden, British Embassy Washington DC
Subject: World Cup Bet

Mr. Longden,

It has not escaped our attention that a certain sporting event is fast approaching, and that our respective nations will soon be meeting on the fields of South Africa. My Ambassador has asked me to see if your Ambassador might be interested in a small wager? We will understand if you decline, given the outcome of the last such encounter.

Sincerely, Philip Breeden, U.S. Embassy, London
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From: Martin Longden, British Embassy Washington DC
To: Philip Breeden, US Embassy London
Subject: Re: World Cup Bet

Mr. Breeden,

Even for such an exceptionally optimistic nation as the United States, I am struck by the confidence with which your Ambassador proposes this wager. It is testament, I assume, to the generosity of your great nation - since the British Ambassador does not anticipate paying out.

Your email does not specify the exact terms of the wager. May I suggest that, in the event of an England victory, the US Ambassador agrees to entertain the British Ambassador at a steak-house of his choosing in downtown DC? And in the event that the United States is able to engineer a fortuitous win over England, then my man will entertain yours at a London pub of his choosing. Loser pays.

Your reference to a previous sporting encounter between our two countries puzzles me. Since the history of English football is long and extensive, in contradistinction to US soccer, I regret that I cannot immediately recall the encounter to which you refer. No doubt it is remembered fondly on these shores; we have quite forgotten it, however.

Are you sure you want to do this?

Yours sincerely,

Martin Longden

British Embassy Washington DC
________________________________

From: Philip Breeden, US Embassy London
To: Martin Longden, British Embassy Washington DC
Subject: Re: World Cup Bet

Mr. Longden ,

It is with great pleasure, and no small measure of anticipation, that the U.S. Ambassador accepts the terms of the wager. I am surprised, given the well known love of the British for history, that you have forgotten what happened the last time the "special relationship" was tested on the pitch. Of course, given the result, you are to be forgiven for having misplaced that particular episode in your memory banks. I refer of course to the victory of the U.S. over England in the 1950 World Cup.

It is true that our soccer (a fine English word we have kindly preserved for you) history is not as long and illustrious as yours. However, as your generals noted during WWII, we have a unique capability for quickly identifying and advancing talent.

Game on!

Sincerely, Philip Breeden
________________________________

From: Martin Longden, British Embassy Washington DC
To: Philip Breeden, US Embassy London
Subject: Re: World Cup Bet

Mr. Breeden,

Very well; it's a bet!

Incidentally, you should know that the Ambassador takes his steak like American soccer victories - somewhat rare.

Sincerely,

Martin Longden

HT: Joe Carter.

Update:

1. After being eliminated from the World Cup, England, Nigeria, Cameroon, and Algeria are expected to arrive back home in the UK later today.

2. An angry fan managed to get into England's changing room after last night's game. Robert Green tried to grab the man but missed.

3. Sorry, all these Robert Green jokes are getting out of hand. In fact, they're crossing the line.

4. The England team went to visit an orphanage in South Africa this morning. "It's so good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constantly struggling, and facing the impossible" said Sipho Umboto, age 6.