Friday, July 17, 2015

Overgrown children



jack-evans-800


One of the oddities of human nature is how two people can see the same thing, but not see the same thing. They are looking at the same thing, but they react to it very differently. For instance:

My friend Alan Jacobs, a traditional sort of Anglican Christian, wrote this the day after the Obergefell ruling:
Perhaps I am soft on sin, or otherwise deficient in serious Christian formation — actually, it’s certain that I am — but in any case I could not help being moved by many of the scenes yesterday of gay people getting married, even right here in Texas. I hope that many American gays and lesbians choose marriage over promiscuity, and I hope those who marry stay married, and flourish.
I know what he’s saying. I felt that too. 
So, I think part of the reason I got a lump in my throat on Friday as I was scrolling through news feeds and seeing gay friends’ pictures pop up on Facebook and Twitter is because I know that for so many of these people, the alternative to their current jubilation has been a gulf of loneliness and marginalization.  
When some of us traditionalist Christians were moved by the pictures we saw of gay couples, or moved by the real-life visits with our gay friends, the day of the SCOTUS ruling, I think this is part of what we were feeling. We were wanting our friends not to be lonely and alienated from love, and we were wanting them to keep hoping and searching for Love Himself. 
http://spiritualfriendship.org/2015/06/28/hoping-for-love/
His post includes the above picture, to illustrate his point. But in a very real sense, he and I aren't seeing the same picture. 
I see a man around 70-years-old, in a business suit, exiting the courthouse, clutching red roses and a civil marriage certificate, followed by his elderly homosexual partner.
The man appears to have an expression of emotional fulfillment. And you know what?–that's pathetic!
He is moved, but I am not. No lump in the throat for me. Why? 
Yes, it means a lot to him. And that's the problem. It means too much to him.
This is not about getting married. Even before the SCOTUS ruling, it was legal for homosexuals to marry. Civil marriage was already legal in some states. And there are liberal denominations which already marry them. 
No. This is about social acceptance. This is about their desperate need to have the approval of total strangers. Have the approval of the church. Have the approval of faceless government bureaucrats.
Well, that's so immature. Why would you want the approval of total strangers? Why is that important to you? 
Normal, emotionally well-adjusted adults don't need the approval of strangers. There's a small circle of people whose opinion they care about. Family and close friends. And in a professional setting, the respect of their peers and colleagues.
But for homosexuals, they can't be happy unless everyone affirms them. Unless everyone validates their lifestyle.
That's emotionally stunted. That's a textbook case of arrested development. 
It's like a kindergartner who wants the teacher to give him a pat on the head–only in this case it's a 70-year-old queen. To be psychologically adult is, among other things, to outgrow the need for anonymous, ubiquitous approval. You care about the opinion of people who care about you. 
The very fact that so many homosexuals have a childish emotional need for universal affirmation reflects something deeply deficient in their social formation. 

5 comments:

  1. No one is asking for your approval. Just get out of the way. Get your nasty, primitive dogma out of civil law. And scream blood and thunder about the queers and the liberals and the atheists in church on Sunday morning. I wouldn't dream of depriving you of the pleasure. Especially because you are committing generational suicide, and I am quite happy to watch you do it. Your congregations will become a thinning sea of gray heads. You will do twenty funerals a year and no baptisms. To paraphrase Goldfinger, I don't expect you to cooperate. I expect you to die.

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    1. i) You need to bone up on American civics. We have a little thing called majority rule. We also have a little thing called the First Amendment.

      If a majority of voters chose to ban civil homosexual marriage, that's their Constitutional prerogative.

      Moreover, my "nasty, primitive dogma" is protected by the First Amendment. By contrast, nasty homosexual activity isn't.

      So, no, we don't have to get out of the way.

      ii) The charge of committing "generational suicide" is ironic in light of impotent homosexual liaisons.

      Likewise, your reference to funerals is equally ironic given the life-threatening diseases and high suicide rates associated with homosexual activity.

      iv) The only congregations that are becoming a thinning sea of gray heads are the mainline denominations which capitulate to radical chic fads like SSM.

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    2. Lawrence

      "No one is asking for your approval. Just get out of the way. Get your nasty, primitive dogma out of civil law. And scream blood and thunder about the queers and the liberals and the atheists in church on Sunday morning. I wouldn't dream of depriving you of the pleasure. Especially because you are committing generational suicide, and I am quite happy to watch you do it. Your congregations will become a thinning sea of gray heads. You will do twenty funerals a year and no baptisms. To paraphrase Goldfinger, I don't expect you to cooperate. I expect you to die."

      It's ironic how supposedly inclusive-minded people (i.e. LGBT advocates) are so exclusive-minded. How supposedly "loving" people are so full of hate. The truth is they really only "love" those with whom they agree. Everyone else can "die."

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    3. Typical hate from the #lovewins crowd.

      I understand the shame and misery streaming from a life set in rebellion against their Maker can't be contained and has to be vented somewhere, but instead of hating their sin, which is the problem, they hate God, Who is the solution.

      Irrational and ironic.

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  2. Very good blog post, blunt and perceptive. Romans 1; they (we: sinners) "not only do such things" (things that we know are worthy of death, says Paul), "but they give hearty approval to others who do likewise."

    As the progression proceeds, that which is intuitively shameful comes out of the closet, and then is emboldened by gathering around itself many others who likewise are venturing into the new territory of "glorying in what ought to be their shame" and then with senses dulled and conscience squashed - they desperately seek the approval of more and more.

    But all in vain, because this God-conscious conscience and internal moral barrometer never leave them alone. Suppressed truth is truth nonetheless and the lies of sin never satisfy - and kicking against the goads, a tormented soul lives on, on the brink of death, often in despair.

    May God in mercy and in grace give many caught up in such deception, the clarity to be honest with themselves - the way of the transgressor is hard; but mercy awaits those who confess and forsake their sin, turning in humble brokenness to the forgiving Savior, Jesus Christ.

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