In the process of that I also came to realize I can’t do monogamy and be happy…Rather than divorce right away, Jen offered to try an alternative for a while to see if that would work for us. So we agreed on some rules and have had an open marriage for almost two years now, and it’s helped us work through a lot of things, and has helped us both in very different ways.
I'd like to briefly discuss the concept of an open marriage. Isn't that oxymoronic? What's the point of getting married in the first place if you continue to play the field?
I suppose the cynical explanation is that an open marriage gives you a fallback in case you can't scrounge up something superior that day. Hookups are better, but that's unpredictable. That depends on having a regular supply of appealing, willing sexual partners. But what if no winsome prospects are available that day?
Well, you always have your spouse to fall back on. If ransacking the singles bars doesn't turn up anything more exciting that day, you still have a sexual partner at home to come back to. Unless your spouse got lucky that evening and is away on a one-night stand.
In an open marriage, the spouse is second-best, but better than nothing if you can't find somebody more appealing when you're in the mood. Just like eating second-rate food is preferable to hunger-pangs.
On the face of it, prostitution might seem to be the best of both worlds for someone like Carrier. But there's a catch: they charge for their services. And the high-end callgirls are pricey.
Perhaps, though, Carrier could set up a special PayPal account to subsidize trips to the brothel.
Coming out poly lends new meaning to "Richard Carrier Games" and Richard Carrier's Marvelous Amusements."