Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Dave Armstrong's glossary

Sample dialogue between Dave Armstrong and his son (Paul):

Paul: Dad, where were you?
Dave: What do you mean?
Paul: You promised to pick me up after baseball practice!
Dave: No, that wasn’t a “promise.” That was an “agreement.”
Paul: What’s the difference?
Dave: An “agreement” is stronger than a “resolution,” but weaker than a “pledge.”
Paul: But you gave your word of honor!
Dave: See “resolution.”
Paul: But you make a commitment to me!
Dave: No, a “commitment” is different than an “agreement.” I only “agreed” to pick you up.
Paul: What’s the difference?
Dave: A “commitment” is stronger than an “agreement,” but weaker than an “oath.”
Paul: Well, I don’t care what you call it as long as you guarantee that you’ll pick me up next time.
Dave: see “promissory note.”

Dave Armstrong's glossary

Agreement: something to keep 5% of the time
Commitment: something to keep 6% of the time
Contract: something to keep 7% of the time
Covenant: something to keep 12% of the time
Guarantee: something to keep 13% of the time
Oath: something to keep 17% of the time
Pledge: something to keep 14% of the time
Promise: something to keep 9% of the time
Promissory note: see “guarantee”
Resolution: something to keep 2% of the time
Sacred word: see “resolution”
Vow: see “covenant.”
Word of honor: see “resolution”


  1. Dave: An “agreement” is stronger than a “resolution,” but weaker than a “pledge.”

    LOL! Brilliant!

  2. Did I misread this from Matthew 5:37:

    "Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil."

  3. Well, Jim, you did misread because you're using your schismatic Protestant private interpretation in interpreting the verse, instead of turning to the Magisterium of the One True Church.

    Now, allow me to point you to where the Pope has infallibly interpreted this verse.

    Hang on a minute...


    It must be around here somewhere...