Trust The Experts

Martin leaned back in his chair, stethoscope around his neck, playing with the lapel of his white lab coat.  “Well, I mean we can’t say anything is impossible.  If we had an extremely unlikely swarm of worst-case scenarios, then it’s possible that everyone could catch this.  But only in a mathematical sense of ‘possible.’  Statistically, it’s more likely that all the water in the Pacific Ocean would quantum leap up to the moon.”  He laughed.

“Thank you for your time,” Larry said.  “You’re quite an expert.”

“Well, that’s what eight years of schooling and another six in residency will get you.  Expertise.”

Larry laughed.  “Man, that’s a lot of school.  I only got my bachelor’s in English.  But don’t worry, I’ve been a journalist reading Twitter for years.  I am just as much an expert and will definitely convey what you told me accurately and precisely.”

Martin nodded, shook Larry’s hand, and returned to his rounds.  After he was finished with his 24-hour shift, he crashed on his sofa and slept so he didn’t get a chance to read his newspaper that day and never saw the article Larry had written.

THE PANDEMIC ARRIVES!  EXPERT SAYS, ‘IT’S POSSIBLE’ EVERYONE WILL DIE!

Scientists Also Concerned Pacific Ocean Might Teleport to Moon