Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Carrie acquitted!


(Reuters) - Today, in a packed courtroom, Carrie White and Liz Sherman were acquitted on charges of murder by arson.

Carrie was charged with incinerating her classmates on prom night, while her codefendant, Liz Sherman, was charged with incinerating staff and patients at the asylum where she was staying.

Lead defense attorney Robert Shapiro used the celebrated “Carrier” defense to get his clients acquitted. In a famous debate with David Marshall, Carrier denied that Jesus ever miraculously healed anyone. Carrier insisted that all his cures were “psychosomatic.”

Taking his cue from Carrier, Mr. Shapiro argued that his clients didn’t really incinerate anyone since pyrokinesis is, by definition, psychosomatic: mind over matter.

Apparently, that was sufficient to convince the jury, although some veteran courtroom reporters privately speculated that jurors were afraid of what Hellboy might to do them if they convicted his girlfriend.


  1. LOL! Good one.

    Just tell yourself, "It's all in my head!" It worked for Lazarus.