Sunday, February 03, 2013

Stop-work order

(Scene: heavenly throne room)

The Omnipotent: Gabriel.

Gabriel: Yes, milord.

The Omnipotent: I see that Zerubbabel is jumping the gun.

Gabriel: What do you mean?

The Omnipotent: He’s laying the foundation for the Millennial temple.

Gabriel: I’m confused. Didn’t Zekiel furnish the blueprint for a physical temple?

The Omnipotent: Yes, but Ezekiel bungled the prophecy by failing to distinguish between the second temple and the third temple! We can’t have Zerubbabel build the third temple even before the second temple has been built and destroyed by the Romans.

That would make the second temple the third temple–or is it the other way round?–which is just plain bad arithmetic, not to mention bad eschatology. If the Romans destroy the third temple in 70 AD, the countdown to Armageddon will kick in way too soon. I already had to reset the eschatological stopwatch once before when Ezra and Nehemiah jumped the gun by laying the cornerstone for the Millennial temple. I scotched that in the nick of time.

Gabriel: Now I understand.

The Omnipotent: Go down there, ASAP, and present a stop-work order to Zerubbabel. While you’re at it, give copies of the injunction to Haggai, and Zechariah.

–which reminds me…Michael.

Michael: Yes, milord

The Omnipotent: Accompany Gabriel. Take along a wrecking crew to pulverize the foundations that Zerubbabel prematurely laid, using Ezekiel’s blueprint.

Michael: Will do.

No comments:

Post a Comment