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Saturday, December 25, 2010

Tracking Santa

Some people think it'd be a lie for adults to tell kids that Santa exists. But the North American Aerospace Defense Command (NORAD) begs to differ:


Now, if our government is complicit in lying to kids by perpetuating the Satan Santa myth, then I suggest these Christians write to our elected government representatives - Congressmen, U.S. Senators, even the POTUS himself! - and demand they put an end to such morally corrosive and vile fabrications! We need to start an anti-Santa campaign, and we need to start now. Time is of the essence.

After all, every day more and more kids succumb to the Santa lie. Who knows how believing such lies will affect the children and lead to their moral corruption? How will it affect future generations? Will the moral filth and vice corrupt society? Perhaps it's only a matter of time before the situation collapses into one worse than that of street urchins in Victorian England such as described in a Dickensian novel. Do we want kids to end up like Nell in The Old Curiosity Shop? If so, then, by all means, please continue to perpetuate the Santa myth.

3 comments:

  1. This isn't clever in the least. Sure, lying about who took the cookies isn't a sign of the apocalypse, but it is still lying, and therefore it is wrong. Just because something doesn't cause major societal damage doesn't mean it is morally right or morally permissible. Have you no clue?

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  2. Unfortunately, this illustrates the vicious cycle of infidelity. Malt disbelieves in Santa because he has no evidence, and he has no evidence because he disbelieves. Santa doesn't leave presents for anti-Santaists like Malt. Why go to all the trouble of squeezing yourself down a grimy old chimney to leave nice presents for a ornery scoffer like Malt?

    Unless and until Malt learns to treat Santa with a modicum of respect, he will never hear the clatter of reindeer on his roof.

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  3. PipMalt said:

    This isn't clever in the least. Sure, lying about who took the cookies isn't a sign of the apocalypse, but it is still lying, and therefore it is wrong. Just because something doesn't cause major societal damage doesn't mean it is morally right or morally permissible. Have you no clue?

    Well there, pardner, I'm afraid that's where we don't quite see eye to eye: I reckon the Santa myth sure could cause "major societal damage"! For one thing, our own government is smack dab in the middle of perpetuating this down right despicable yarn. Worse, our government is in cahoots with them no good stinkin' industrial boys to get at our youngsters and bring 'em on in to work in them there mines for real cheap making them new fangled gadgets and gizmos alongside the rest of them elf like critters.

    You sure are right I ain't got no clue about any of this, though, as I'm just a tenderfoot in this whole shindig, and moving along like tumbleweed across a ghost town, while the rest of these sophisticated fellas are slick as eels and are running circles round me! Lassoing them and rounding them up is like trying to lasso a wild stallion, let me tell you! I don't know what I've gotten myself into this time. Doggone it!

    On a more serious note, Steve has already dealt with the "lying" objection in a couple of past posts. Just head over to the frontpage and mosey on down the archives section of the blog till you find what you're looking for.

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