I've been giving a correspondent (who shall remain nameless to protect the innocent) some tips on how to join the exclusive club of the Truly Reformed. Here's a transcript of our little exchange:
Novitiate: And I don't know if I'm "TR" now, for that matter. Depends who's asking I suppose.
Hays: To be TR, you must receive Chrismation at the hands of James White or one of his anointed deputies on a full moon at Cathedral St-Pierre in Geneva.
Reservations are generally booked about 10 yrs. in advance. But I might be able to use my connections with the Privy Council to get you up bumped up the list.
There's a small surcharge. Just bring a suitcase containing non-sequentially numbered, large denomination bills.
Novitiate: Doesn't one also have to recite the entire WCF by memory?
Hays: Not quite. You have to recite the entire WCF backwards by memory.
Novitiate: And commit to drinking wine at least once a day?
Hays: As long as it's Klingon blood wine, although you're allowed to substitute Romulan ale on Calvin's birthday.
Novitiate: Whoa, you actually talk to White? I assume you genuflect no less than 5 times beforehand...
Hays: And cross myself.
"I've been giving a correspondent (who shall remain nameless to protect the innocent) some tips on how to join the exclusive club of the Truly Reformed."
ReplyDeleteIf I'm a joyful signer of the Manhattan Declaration, can I still be a member of "the exclusive club of the Truly Reformed"?
That depends on whether you can give a straight answer to the question, "Does Rome proclaim a false gospel?"
ReplyDeleteInnocent? Ain't nothing innocent about me, I can tell you. :-D
ReplyDeleteGeek.
ReplyDelete