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Friday, October 02, 2009

Grace unlimited!

Wesley: Howdy, there, stranger. Don’t believe I’ve seen you before.

Asbury: The missus and I just moved to Aldersgate.

Wesley: Where from?

Ausbury: Geneva!

Wesley: Ugh! Glad you were able to escape that sinkhole of deviltry.

Ausbury: So am I!

Wesley: So what brings you to Wesley Bros. Feed & Grain Store?

Asbury: I was told that this is where I could stock up on some of that unlimited grace.

Wesley: Well, friend, you’ve come to the right place!

Asbury: How much am I allowed to take?

Wesley: As much as you want. That’s the nice thing about unlimited grace. Not like that miserly ol' Calvinism.

Asbury: What size does it come in?

Wesley: All shapes and sizes. We have grace by the bushel, barrel, dry gallon, liquid gallon, cubic foot, cubic yard. Liter. Deciliter. Hectoliter. And Kiloliter.

Asbury: I’m not sure how much I can fit into the trunk of my car.

Wesley: No problem. You can always come back for more. Or rent a van or trailer or pick-up truck.

Asbury: How much should I get?

Wesley: Depends on how much storage space you have. Whether you have an apartment, house, attic, basement, 3-car garage, barn, tool shed, and so on.

Asbury: How much do you recommend? Is a kiloliter better than a liter?

Wesley: Depends on what you mean. Technically speaking, a kiloliter of resistible grace is just as resistible as a liter of resistible grace.

Asbury: So what’s the advantage of unlimited grace? What’s the point of having all that grace?

Wesley: Cuz it’s so darn tootin' generous! Why, Farmer John over there was a whole barn full of resistible grace. Barrows of resistible grace. Rows of resistible grace. Stacked from floor to ceiling.

Asbury: Why?

Wesley: It’s so nice to look at. He spends hours a day just gazing at all that prodigious, resistible grace. Admiring the sheer munificence of it all.

Spends hours a day counting and labeling all his neatly stacked barrows of ineffectual grace.

Asbury: Does it keep him from sinning or losing his salvation?

Wesley: Heck no! But it’s just so doggone magnanimous. So awesome to sit there and contemplate all that fathomless, ineffectual grace.

An inexhaustible supply of it. As much grace as you could ever hope to resist. No matter how often you resist it, there’s always more to resist. You never run out of grace to resist. I mean, ain’t that just too wonderful for words?

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